SOS: Use technical language and phrases.
Use a variety of descriptive language techniques
Use direct speech
Use verbs and adverbs to describe how someone is doing something or saying something
The Maori Chief
As I walk past the rattling bushes leaves crushed under my feet, everything was peaceful until a mysterious man jumps out. Sweat starts to roll down my face as his brown beedy eyes stare into mine. My body starts trembling he stood there right in front of me as still as a statue. His dark hair glistened in the sunlight as his grey feathery cloak danced with the wind, his hand gripping onto his wooden taiaha.
You hooked me in with a great first sentence
ReplyDeleteYou used great describing words
Next time use more punctuation
great story very descriptive
ReplyDeleteyour first sentence hooked me in.
ReplyDeleteyou put lots of descriptive language. next time add more punctuation.
Can i get a Hoya!
ReplyDeleteI like the way you described the character.
I like the way you hooked in the reader.
Your next step is to use more punctuation.
hi i like the way you described the character and you used descriptive words your next step is use four types of punctuation
ReplyDeletehi i like the way you described the character and you used descriptive words your next step is use four types of punctuation
ReplyDeletevery descriptive great story loved it
ReplyDeleteI like the way you described the character and your story was very descriptive your next step is more punctuation
ReplyDeleteHey Angela
ReplyDeleteI like the way you used descriptive language
I like the way you showed not told
Your next step is to use more punctuation